It seems that I write pretentious, poetical things when I respond to FB queries about women and some other things. I’m going to randomly post the ones my ego doesn’t want to let go of here. Maybe someday they will be useful.
Feel free to use them so long as you credit me.
In response to someone asking how I picture a beautiful woman:
She is young. Over the years she has changed though, is no longer blonde, blue eyed but is dusky skinned, with wavy, wild dark hair and eyes like dark, warm caves. Someday I hope she is old, wrinkled, wizened and, perhaps, abundantly fleshed.
I stand at the edge. Behind is the brilliant sunlight, the obviousness of day. Ahead is a silky twilight, shufflings, snufflings, the embrace of the shadow. I slip in.
A question something like this: Tell about the women you love in your life, the ones who are your soul mates, the ones you know will be able to drive the getaway car.
Is it possible to tell this in words? To explain what only the heart can know? To describe the knowing that our sisters can hold us in and through anything…our darkness and rage and our bleeding, screaming nightmares and our hope-against-all-hope, our joy, our incredible depths of beauty and success.
I’m not sure words can do it justice.
And this is what becoming a Priestess and a Magdalene offered to me, my daughters, my siStars, my Priestesses. All of that wordless beauty and a lineage of women both backward and forward.
In response to woman who seemed extremely fearful about a friend holding a Moon Lodge or Red Tent:
It has been my experience that Moon Lodges and Red Tent Temples are open to everyone, no matter their race, religion or other defining attributes. They are also free of charge to all, though the hostess might ask for donations if she is holding the gatherings in her home, or for the church or other space if held outside the home. (Toilet paper, dish washing, cleaning, etc all cost something.)
These gatherings are not about religion and have no ill intent. I’m curious about the concerns or fear this engenders for you, Christi? The vast majority of our country’s worshippers are Christian and there is no danger of that shifting any time soon but quite often Christians feel threatened by any activity that isn’t church sanctioned. I wonder why that is.
I, too, live in the buckle of the Bible Belt, just a few miles from Pat Robertson, and have been holding a Red Tent Temple for 7 years now. The attendees are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan, Wiccan, Atheist, Agnostic, whatever and no one who comes cares at all. We gather not to discuss religion or convert anyone but to find the points of intersection where all women share common experience and to talk openly, in a sacred space, about our lives, pains, fears, hurts and joys!
From a post to SHEphia, deleted almost immediately: This is likely to be an incomplete thought but…AS connects to Priestess as a sexual archetype. For me, and for many, many other women, Priestess is much more than that. For me, Priestess begins with a woman who has reclaimed her virgin self, who is complete, whole, entire unto herself. A woman who is doing the deep work of healing herself.
I would love to see each of us record a video of how we have been Priestess-ing since this group came together. Then, possibly, in addition to our festival calls, we could also do a check in around how we’ve been doing *something* *anything* around Priestessing since our last call.
Our calls tend to be extremely ADD, so the deep check-in would be via video. Perhaps the SiStar connected with the festival could lead us into the call with a prayer or meditation or poem or something.
And we would close off the cycle of daily practice at that time and the next siStar would send us a new practice (not too long, not complicated) at that time.
I feel like this would lead each of us to connect with one another daily in the ethers, to trust, deeply, one another, and to make a love offering to our little tribe.
Semele Xerri–possibly, if you’re feeling ‘up’ about it, you should lead the way? Would that be helpful for you? Help you to trust that we are connecting and not disrupting, disconnecting, etc?
The sexual priestess is part of the priestess archetype but is not the sole resonance. I think that we all embody that part of her in different ways. My intention is not to disown that but to re-own all of the other parts.
I talk about Patriarchy in terms of archetypes in my circles sometimes. As in: Picture a police officer; picture the ideal American; picture a soldier in the Army; an airline pilot; a Reverend; etc.
If any adult American pictures someone other than a white male in the absence of having a contact who is one of these things and not white and male, that person is *an extreme rarity*.
If you are going to be saved (or arrested); the perfect patriot; save your country; fly an airplane; or preach, if you are not a white male, you have already fallen short of the ideal.
That is Patriarchy. Yes, it is conditioned. It is real. It intentionally diminishes anything *other* that white and cis male.
Realization: thinking on what this stuff in my body is a physical manifestation of…
>damping my own desire to heal naturally in order to have a quick fix via medication goes against everything I believe, or purport to believe. Disallowing my own sensibilities, desires and knowings in favor of doing what someone else tells me to.
>lack of support of my feminine.
An entire life during which my feminine has not been supported by the men in my life (Dad, especially.) Lack of belief in my own self, Patriarchal brainwashing has me by the ovaries, literally. This is reflected in the state of my home–parts of our house are in disrepair, are falling apart and are not being cared for because I can’t afford it and my husband won’t afford it and Dad won’t help. Lack. Of. Support.
Where to go from here? IDK. And feel free to scroll past this without comment. I’m really feeling panicked about another summer inside, in a chair, missing more of myself.
Trying on new ideas daily: opting out of the surgery; allowing the surgeon to take all of my internal lady parts; letting only the ovary and cysts go but continuing to bleed for *how long*? Yes, I stopped the progesterone because it was causing the cysts to grow out of control but am already bleeding again.
I want my hormones. I want my pheromones. I want to want to make love, to keep my relatively good breasts, for my skin to not thin out to crepe…It’s a lot to process in a week and I appreciate the room to write and vent and whine. xo